[Flumper Barflusterbutt]

Israel's Dead Sea is 1,312 feet below sea level because it was where Chuck Dorris axe-kicked his last opponent

[Flumper Barflusterbutt]

Lemmings run off cliffs because of Chuck Norris.

[Banana]

Chuck Norris once could not find Waldo; they do not make those books any more.

[Flumper Barflusterbutt]

A woman once claimed to be pregnant with Chuck Norris' child. Chuck rubbed his beard on her belly, and two weeks later she urinated an aborted fetus along with the first season DVD of Walker, Texas Ranger.

[Flumper Barflusterbutt]

If Chuck Norris does not wake up with a big pair of titties in hand then thirty necks must be broken for it to be a good day anyway.

[Flumper Barflusterbutt]

Chuck Norris put Humpty Dumpty back together again just so he could break him.

[Flumper Barflusterbutt]

Chuck Norris' favorite smell is that of his opponents soiled pants.

[Flumper Barflusterbutt]

As part of a social awareness campaign, Chuck Norris battled racism. He won, and though he jump-kicked racism right over the edge of a cliff, racism managed to survive. He's been holding back and biding his time for another chance at Norris.

[Flumper Barflusterbutt]

Even though Chuck Norris has never bothered to learn how to read, he still gets the full effect of Alphabet Soup.

[ntype]

Fuck that geriatric ass

2nd

[Undeadcannibal]

chuck norris used to be a cool fad...